I find myself doing/not-doing something that I had consciously intended/agreed to do/not do
I understand that this was an unconscious but habitual doing/not-doing
p.e.lighting a cigarette while I wanted to quit
how do I react ?
Do I install mechanisms to bring my intentions/agreements into my daily consciousness ?
If no, why not ?
I do not find myself doing/not-doing something that I had consciously intended/agreed to do/not do
somebody or something reminds me of the non-realised intention/agreement
how do I react ?
Do I accept the remark ?
Do I install mechanisms to bring my intentions/agreements into my daily consciousness ?
Or do I throw a tantrum, pushing the conscious realisation away ?
Why ?
Do I really want to keep my consciousness separated from my acts ?
Why ?
Do I know that I separate myself in this way from inner spiritual union ?
Do I know that I separate myself in this way from deep union with people I want to be close to
How far do I want to go in convincing myself&others that I was not “doing/not-doing something that I had consciously intended/agreed to do/not do” ?
Am I ready to cut my social ties with whoever witnesses my “doing/not-doing something that I had consciously intended/agreed to do/not do” ?
Why ?
Deeper
how real are the intentions/agreements I make with myself if part of me says&another part of me does/does not according to how I feel ?
Maybe it is time to review my intentions/agreements&only keep the ones I can do wholeheartedly